Becoming a couple brings a beautiful opportunity to start fresh with holiday traditions that reflect who you are together. Whether it’s your first holiday season as a pair or you’re simply ready to put your unique spin on celebrations, crafting traditions can make the season feel even more special.
A great way to start is by establishing some “holiday rules” and creating the atmosphere that feels just right for both of you. Here’s a guide to help you start traditions that will make your holidays as a couple unforgettable.
Step 1: Set the Ground Rules for Your Holidays
Holidays often come with expectations from family, friends, and even childhood memories. Setting some clear “holiday rules” ensures you’re aligned as a couple and creates space to prioritize what truly matters to you both.
1. Decide How You’ll Divide Your Time
Discuss how you’ll spend your holidays, especially if you both have families or traditions from before you were together. Some ideas include:
- Alternating years with each family.
- Hosting one big gathering with everyone.
- Spending Christmas Eve with one family and Christmas Day with the other.
- Prioritizing a day just for the two of you.
2. Define Your Gift-Giving Rules
Set a budget or agree on creative ways to approach gifting to avoid stress or mismatched expectations. For example:
- Exchange only homemade gifts.
- Focus on experiences, not things.
- Do a fun themed exchange, like only gifting items under $20 or something tied to an inside joke.
3. Decide How to Handle the Calendar Chaos
With so many events and gatherings, it’s easy to feel stretched thin. Agree on how many events you’ll attend together versus apart, and be clear about your boundaries to make sure you both stay energized and present.
Step 2: Create Your Own Holiday Atmosphere
The holidays aren’t just about traditions—they’re about creating a warm, joyful environment that reflects who you are as a couple. Start by setting the mood at home.
1. Decorate Together
Pick a decorating day to turn your home into a holiday haven. Choose decorations that blend your styles or reflect shared interests, such as:
- A quirky tree ornament for every year you’re together.
- Decorations inspired by a trip or memory you both cherish.
- DIY projects like homemade wreaths, stockings, or garlands.
2. Curate the Holiday Scent
Fill your home with seasonal scents to enhance the festive vibe:
- Light candles with cinnamon, vanilla, or pine aromas.
- Bake cookies together for that fresh-from-the-oven smell.
- Use essential oils in a diffuser, like peppermint or spiced orange.
3. Set the Soundtrack
Music can define your holiday atmosphere. Create a playlist of your favorite seasonal songs, or try something new like:
- A mix of nostalgic tunes from your childhoods.
- A rotation of holiday jazz or acoustic covers.
- Incorporating music from cultures or traditions you want to explore together.
Step 3: Start New Traditions Together
Now that you’ve set the rules and atmosphere, it’s time to focus on traditions that make your holidays uniquely yours.
1. Plan a Signature Holiday Activity
Pick an activity that you both love and turn it into a yearly ritual, such as:
- Watching the same holiday movie (or series of movies) every Christmas Eve.
- Cooking a holiday meal or baking a signature treat together.
- Going for a late-night drive to see Christmas lights in your neighborhood.
2. Give Back Together
Make generosity part of your holiday traditions by:
- Volunteering at a local shelter or food bank.
- Donating to a charity you both believe in.
- Adopting a family in need for the holidays and shopping for their wish list.
3. Celebrate the Small Things
Sometimes, the smallest traditions bring the most joy. Try these simple ideas:
- Open one gift each on Christmas Eve.
- Write each other a heartfelt holiday letter instead of (or alongside) gifts.
- Count down to Christmas with a couple’s advent calendar filled with surprises like notes, photos, or mini-treats.
Step 4: Make Space for Flexibility
As life evolves, so will your traditions. Give yourselves permission to adjust your plans and expectations as needed:
- Be open to trying new traditions. Maybe one year it’s a ski trip, and the next it’s a cozy holiday at home.
- Blend your traditions with those of your future children, family, or friends.
- Embrace imperfection. Some of the most cherished traditions come from unexpected, funny, or even chaotic moments.
Step 5: Keep the Focus on Each Other
Holidays are about connection, not perfection. Through all the planning and traditions, remember to pause and savor the time you’re spending together.
- Plan a holiday date night, even if it’s just hot cocoa and a Christmas movie at home.
- Reflect on the year together and share your hopes for the next one.
- Capture moments—whether it’s photos, a keepsake, or a simple memory—to celebrate how far you’ve come as a couple.
Final Thoughts
Starting your own holiday traditions as a couple is about building a foundation of love, joy, and togetherness. By setting clear rules, creating a festive atmosphere, and choosing traditions that feel meaningful to you both, you’ll make every holiday season one to remember.
Happy holidays, and here’s to celebrating the magic of you!
